Annoyed

Annoyed by dumb asses... it seems that constantly I run into them-the ones who think they are better than me; the ones who make fools of themselves, yet girls think they are great. This is a fine line: douche bags and dumb asses. How can you define the difference? Hell, sometimes I don't even know. I'm just sick of it all. I log onto facebook and see that ___ posted another fucking picture of himself with no shirt on (flexing his muscles, or holding some plaque). Isn't this just asking for another guy to insult you? I know that you desperately want a girl to notice you. In my book, it's known as "trying to hard" or "striving for attention". Maybe posting a picture just being yourself would work better...
This annoyance leaves me wondering... am I really annoyed, or am I jealous? No... I am annoyed- bothered by all the people who show off too damn much. Sure, I might not have much I can really show off, but I still don't let that take over my life...

Douche bags

Today was pretty nice out, minus the rain early this morning and the wind, as the temperature was great. A day like this is comparable to a girl who dates a douche bag- she can be nice (like the temperature), but ruined by the rain & wind (the douche bag boyfriend). Why the fuck do douche bags get boyfriends? This question has been bothering me for awhile... why can't nice girls go for nice guys? (not implying me), it's just that I feel they deserve better. Just walking around campus today, I noticed several douche bag guys w/ a girlfriend. It's just so stupid, yet I will never understand the reason it has to be that way...
Today I felt that skipping class was vital, as I got a nap in, which was much more important. My run today was decent, just short. When I ran, my mind was filled with endless randomness- when is break? when will __ and __ break up? When will I get a better test grade? When will I quit thinking of stupid ass questions when I run? I may experience random thoughts, but it's like a guide for life: be random. With order, there isn't enough fun, as you are watered down by the norms that are set. Fuck the norms. I am who I am and no one can stop that. "Life is a highway", so yield once in awhile, but never, NEVER stop living your own life...

Post # 1

It's about time I got a blog, as I need some place to journal. Who's brilliant idea was it to call it a blog anyway? What the fuck does it stand for? I get the "log" part, as log means you are "logging information down". Since it's on the Internet, why didn't they name it a wlog (web- log), except that doesn't quite roll off the tongue too easily, so how about ilog (Internet- log). I am... a stroke of genius. Enough of this stupid introduction, let's get rolling with the college life...
1.5 years down already...damn, where has time went? That translates to: shit, I will be completely out on my own, in about 2.5 - 3 years, so might as well enjoy the sweet college life now, while I have the chance!
Today was like any other day: pointless class (in which I don't pay attention), then settled down in the evening to play some video games, but one minor detail was left out. I got another piercing. This is my 3rd one. I have two on my left ear (one lobe, one cartilage) and the new one on my right ear (cartilage). I hope this is my last one, as I don't want to scare girls away with too many ha ha. Of course, my parents think I still have only one (left ear lobe). This ongoing staying - undercover - hiding from my parents life presents a challenge: the double life. At home, I am forced to go to Church (nothing wrong with it, but I never go here @ college), I can't cuss, as "I don't cuss", can't blast music whenever I feel like it, etc. It becomes so hard, especially when you have to lie to your parents: "No, when I am around people who drink, I let them know I don't drink and then leave." Sure, they would be heartbroken and pissed off if they knew I partied, but... it's college, so I want to live my own damn life, but maybe I lived a little too much last semester...
I took today off from running, as I take one day off a week, so I HAVE to run the rest of the week. If only I wouldn't have fucked around so much last semester, I would be on the track team right now, but instead I am on academic probation. Next semester I will be back on the xc team, ready to roll (Go Dutch!!!)
As of right now, I have both academic goals, running goals, and what you might call a relationship goal (in which I wish to find a girl that is right for me. This goal brought on the inspiration of this poem:

LADDER

Getting my hopes up is like climbing a ladder, when I step on the top, I will easily fall; the mistake lies in me climbing in the first place. Each step on the ladder is fake; imagination deceives me; I'm not getting any closer to achievement. Forever I'm stuck seeing the ladder, yet I can't seem to climb it. The concept is easy: one foot after another, step by step, yet applying the concept is impossible for me. At times, I seem to be on the first step, but then I realize that it was an accident for me to be there, as I don't belong on the ladder. I'm told that someday I will be able to climb the ladder, yet the top of the ladder seems to be moving farther up away from me. My "friends" can reach the top, and their example sends me into a walk of shame. Forever trying to climb, I still struggle to reach the 1st step...